What is surprising

lsproule@thereview.ca
Who wants to go to a ploughing match? Well, said those of us who were in the know, it is much more than just a ploughing match. And from what we hear, those of you who took the risk and attended the “IPM” were surprised at all there was to see and do.
But it seems to me that there aren’t very many surprises any more. How often do you hear, “That doesn’t surprise me,” or, “That’s not surprising.” These comments are usually given voice with a tone of sarcastic disappointment.
But I think we aren’t surprised any more because we don’t want surprises. We eat at the same restaurants and well-known food chains because we know exactly how the food will be presented and how it will taste.
Just yesterday a man stood perplexed in the bread aisle. Where are the bread crumbs, he wanted to know. I pointed out the breadcrumbs in cardboard containers on the top shelf. They used to be in boxes, he answered, refusing to take one of these “new” containers from the shelf.
At our local farmers’ market, reassuring same-ness is tough to achieve. Each week, the baker’s bread might not look exactly the same as the previous week. One vendor told me that customers preach the need for consistency. Yes, make sure that the carrots are all the same size and that each batch of chutney tastes exactly like the all the other batches.
We don’t like surprises. I have attended concerts where the audience grumbles when the performer’s hit song doesn’t sound quite the same as the version played on the radio.
And then there are the routine standing ovations. Audiences give these all the time, so there goes another surprise. Instead, performers hold hands onstage, bow and look expectantly out at the audience. A few stand up and the rest of us stand up and applaud. That’s no surprise, is it?
I can’t figure out what kind of numbing groove our brains are in to expect everything to be the same as the last time we tasted, watched or listened.
We do try to surprise our friends and family with fun things: like parties to mark milestone birthdays. Why don’t we take a new path and throw someone a surprise party at 52 or 67?
But we are so stuck that even that just doesn’t seem right, does it?
The kind of surprises we enjoy these days are indicative of our overall ennui.
I am surprised if I buy something new and it works on the first try. I am surprised if I lay out all the parts to assemble something and . . . they are all there! I am surprised if I call for customer service and the wait is less than 10 minutes and they offer to send me the replacement part . . . cheerfully.
But it’s not all bad. We just have to work a little to open our hearts and minds to let surprises in. The older we get, the harder it is to just let something happen without anticipating the 15 ways it could go. Sometimes, it feels good to just turn down the volume of past experiences and disappointments.
There is still the wonder of how good something is when you taste it for the first time. There is still the surprise of that first crunch into a fresh apple at the farmers’ market – where the apples might not all be the same size.
There is the happy surprise when a day for your special event turns out to be sunny and warm even though rain was in the forecast.
There is the surprise of someone you barely know walking up to you and saying something that makes you feel good about who you are.
Sometimes, it’s just plain surprising where a day will take you.