Why is it hard to take action?

lsproule@thereview.ca
It was probably the looming New Year that got me thinking. As I chatted at a home-leaving party on December 29 I considered what happens inside us to make us take action. We were at a home-leaving party, which a co-worker had hosted at last. Two years after moving in to his apartment, he was moving and realized: he had never organized a promised house-warming.
No one focused on the two-year delay; all was washed away with the completion of this task, his finally hosting us at his home and the new-ness awaiting him after his move to new quarters.
Everywhere I went during the holidays, people seemed to be talking about things they needed to do or wanted to do. People talked about problems and reviewed various courses of action long considered, with nary a decision in sight because we are not sure of the right thing to do.
When we are beleaguered by a task undone, there are so many reasons for our work stoppage that we can easily skip from one reason to another and continue to do nothing.
There never seems to be a good time for home renovations; we can sit and stare and think about that small job that needs doing, or that paint touch-up job and …. do nothing.
We stow excess items in our closets, in cupboards and in our basements until the sorting, disposal or decisions about each item seem overwhelming in every way . . . and do nothing.
I can remember putting off homework until Sunday evening even though I knew the work to be done would lurk in my mind all weekend. So I believe that when we don’t take action, we often are doing something: we are letting our “to-do” list or our unfinished business clutter up our minds.
These days, I hear people discuss unfinished projects of a size that one cannot see an opening to tackle the beast.
Some of my own include: quilt pieces ready to be pieced together, au urgently-needed sorting of oddball items in our basement and deciding whether I am still someone who likes to sew or whether I will continue as a straight-up collector of pieces of fabric . . . for some day.
I asked you on Facebook what you do to get going . . .  to take action.
A common suggestion was to assign yourself just 15 minutes per day to a task that seems overwhelming. With this, I have to agree. And I would add: stop working on the task after 15 minutes or whatever time you have set for yourself. Within a few days, you will see that you have made a dent in the project and instead of seeing the unfinished job, the end will be in sight as more and more gets accomplished.
Sometimes, we get in over our heads when we set task for ourselves without considering all of the implications. CBC host and writer Peter Gzowski said something that I will never forget: He loved having written, but hated writing. (Maybe I want to have that quilt but I don’t really want to do the work.)
I take that to mean (for big challenges, at least): be sure you like what you set out to do before you set out to do it. On the other hand, picturing a finished quilt, or seeing yourself wear a beautiful sweater, or that new addition to your home can often be the inspiration to begin something. I think the people who can visualize clearly all of the steps between the thought and the finished reality are those who move forward with ease.
To get myself moving forward, I try to focus on how I will feel after I have taken action. If I can imagining the relief, or the feeling of accomplishment, I will usually take some steps to get moving. As someone said on Facebook, I break it down into pieces and move ahead.
You can also ask for help. If a big job seems like it is too much, maybe you are right and it is too much. Ask for help. Ask for help to paint the bathroom. I sometimes wonder why it is so easy for twenty-somethings to paint an apartment together, or move someone in an afternoon but we adults grit our teeth and transplant 50 perennials on our own.
Sometimes, it helps just to talk about it. What is needed to get your own task moving may seem perfectly straightforward to someone else. And while you are talking, you may come smack up against the very thing that has been holding you back.
Some of you said: plan a reward for yourself when you accomplish what you set out to do. That is also a good plan. The truth is: no one is a bad person because they aren’t getting to something that needs doing. It just might be that postponing action is also giving you a free pass to criticize yourself and confirm that you aren’t as good, as smart or as organized as other people.
But maybe over-analyzing isn’t the answer.
It is never too late to take action, apologize or send a thank-you note. It is never too late to say what needs to be said or to clean the cobwebs out of your closet. Maybe everything is unfolding just fine, thank you and we should all be more patient with ourselves.
January is just a page on the calendar. This is not the only time of year we can make a fresh start. It can happen any day. You decide when the time is right to take action.